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This is my blog (now there is a surprise!). I will be sticking in it poetry, prose, random musings, things that take my fancy and more than likely lots of pictures of cats. I hope you find something to amuse and/or interest you here.

Monday 18 April 2011

more shadorma.

Well, I tried.


So here’e the Poetry Form challenge for today~ transform one or both of the following  poems into shadorma form.

My response to Rainy Day Jersey by Dustus.  - Sorry Dustus!


Out of time,
coffee drinking scribe
fits no more,
while rain pours,
short on money, sleep and dreams.
full of tortured hope.


10 comments:

  1. Sorry? That's pretty damn good. Just woke up this morning to read this one, and I'm kind of freaked out because (and I don't know how you did this) but your first line references one of my favorite CDs; as did the original writing of Rainy Day Jersey with the Springsteen reference.

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  2. This poem kind of got me thinking about life of artist, they create a lot but get almost nothing out of it. Great shadorma.

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  3. A raw description of a persona in identity crisis! Terrific!

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  4. tortured hope...yeah i feel this one...nice...artists catch raw emo often in empathy and it can be over welming..

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  5. And they say there is no such thing as coincidence.

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  6. Rainy day coffee drinker?! We have a club going here Pen lol you did really well!

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  7. You did a great job with this Shadorma! I think you were right on in your response... loved it!

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  8. This was excellent. As everyone said. I think if you write several you'll find as everyone has said, it begins to feel very natural while keeping the quality of free verse. I like it a lot and really like what you did with the original keeping the same tone and the same feeling. Gay

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  9. I think it was perfect - and that doesn't even include how well done it was a Shadorma

    Loved it!!!

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