tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post2452676507273430862..comments2023-06-28T16:33:17.006+01:00Comments on Pen's Random Jottings: High OctainPennyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11084508068938703918noreply@blogger.comBlogger16125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-88160970879390124282011-05-25T12:21:18.671+01:002011-05-25T12:21:18.671+01:00Lovely, gone with the wind!Lovely, gone with the wind!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-2022541596652504862011-05-24T15:06:55.482+01:002011-05-24T15:06:55.482+01:00even though I don't know enought to give a opi...even though I don't know enought to give a opinion as to the merits of the particular form of poetry that is being attempted,I really enjoy what you write so well every day.Thanks for the beauty you allow into my life.richardpiszczekhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05568291703869865416noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-79765607695479755712011-05-24T08:46:57.480+01:002011-05-24T08:46:57.480+01:00Very accomplished use of the rhyme-scheme. I liked...Very accomplished use of the rhyme-scheme. I liked the way you made the first octain quite literal, and the second a metaphor.Lucy Westenrahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12787225228788303013noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-74141261738593951752011-05-23T23:35:14.442+01:002011-05-23T23:35:14.442+01:00Really nice Octain Penny! The changing refrain car...Really nice Octain Penny! The changing refrain carries you message beautifully. ~ RoseAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09988016086874324471noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-10428137060819131392011-05-23T21:37:47.723+01:002011-05-23T21:37:47.723+01:00Thanks Everyone. I did mean ease in that refrain,...Thanks Everyone. I did mean ease in that refrain, Luke. I'm please you thought it worked.Pennyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11084508068938703918noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-2143023593238852512011-05-23T21:25:32.321+01:002011-05-23T21:25:32.321+01:00Very nice! High Octain - and in iambic tetrameter ...Very nice! High Octain - and in iambic tetrameter too... you nailed the form and have some lovely lines of poetry here. I particularly like the subtle (I assume not a typo?) change in the third refrain from 'trees' to 'ease'; what a difference it makes to the sense in that passage. It lend the piece more interest and just enough difference at that point where two identical consecutive refrain lines can in some contexts seem too repetitive.<br /><br />Favourite lines I think are these two so full of raw poetry of the anthropomorphic/pathetic fallacy variety -<br /><br />The anguished branch so sadly sees<br />its ravaged leaves and, rocking, grieves >superb... <br /><br />Great piece<br /><br />LukeLuke Praterhttp://lukepraterswordsalad.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-83894947280456635392011-05-23T21:17:45.034+01:002011-05-23T21:17:45.034+01:00Your subtle shift in the refrain is fabulous and c...Your subtle shift in the refrain is fabulous and carries the transition of thought through the piece. Wonderful use of the High Octain form. I enjoyed this.<br /><br />BethAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-5042640173830218272011-05-23T20:19:24.138+01:002011-05-23T20:19:24.138+01:00Lovely combination... timely in light of the disas...Lovely combination... timely in light of the disaster in Joplin, MissouriAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-61052907870157203442011-05-23T18:32:24.915+01:002011-05-23T18:32:24.915+01:00Nice switch of refrain and good themeNice switch of refrain and good themeJohn (@bookdreamer)https://www.blogger.com/profile/11576434749272275190noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-74897166246129611192011-05-23T15:55:21.883+01:002011-05-23T15:55:21.883+01:00Blow those winds of change Pen, excellent high oct...Blow those winds of change Pen, excellent high octain, I chickened on the doubler lolAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-76030103514081445992011-05-23T15:02:35.884+01:002011-05-23T15:02:35.884+01:00Penny you nailed this !!
Love it !Penny you nailed this !!<br />Love it !JL Dodgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12713220952100680871noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-48883737128372470932011-05-23T13:52:10.779+01:002011-05-23T13:52:10.779+01:00Good morning Penny! This is wonderful! Love it!Good morning Penny! This is wonderful! Love it!Helena Whitehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03022290127423654311noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-35066359367411909982011-05-23T13:30:58.285+01:002011-05-23T13:30:58.285+01:00Carefully wrought stanzas with the metaphor workin...Carefully wrought stanzas with the metaphor working in different ways through each. This flows naturally and easily. I expect it took a while to carve out. Well done. GayBeachannyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08638256396472533685noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-22684744760518690542011-05-23T13:21:08.912+01:002011-05-23T13:21:08.912+01:00This rolls off the tongue and I love the turn in t...This rolls off the tongue and I love the turn in the middle both of meaning and the refrain. masterful.S and Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10417934974170964971noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-58955936045692679812011-05-23T11:17:24.312+01:002011-05-23T11:17:24.312+01:00Hello! Winds of change? We match in more ways than...Hello! Winds of change? We match in more ways than having the same name ourselves!! Loved this!Jinksyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01686101468214361004noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3880438130642340958.post-90702431254835242122011-05-23T10:47:50.242+01:002011-05-23T10:47:50.242+01:00Love the flow - it reads so easily - lovely poem !...Love the flow - it reads so easily - lovely poem !Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com