http://www.napowrimo.net/ "And now for our daily prompt (optional, as always). Today, we challenge you to write a poem that takes the form of a warning label . . . for yourself! "
Sarcastic blogger
deprived of cats and coffee
can be corrosive.
And the full sheet:
1.1 Product identifier: · Trade name: Jotting Pen ·
1.2 Relevant identified uses of the substance or mixture and uses advised against: General random blogger with poetic tendencies. . · Product category: Human Being. Anti-social and introverted. Does not mix well with other products of same category· Magnetic attraction to all products in the category Feline, can be difficult to separate. Not recommended for use in public relations.
1.3 Details of the supplier of the safety data sheet · Manufacturer/Supplier: Act of God Contact via local church. Pray for product information ·
1.4 Emergency telephone number: Emergency Response: England 999, International 911.
2.1 Classification of the substance or mixture · Classification according to Regulation (EC) No 1272/2008 d~Sarcastic – can cause severe damage to ego. Causes more volatile products to spontaneously combust or explode ·
2.2 Label elements · Labelling according to Regulation (EC) No 1272/2008 The product is classified and labelled according to the CLP regulation. · Signal word: Danger · Hazard-determining components of labelling: Jotting Pen · Hazard statements: H314 Causes severe ego burns and temper damage. · Precautionary Statements: Precautionary statements P101 If medical advice is needed, have product sedated. P102 Keep children out of reach. P103 Read label before use. P260 Do not provoke with stupidity P280 Wear protective gag.
P405 Store locked up in a quiet area with felines.
P501 Dispose of contents/container in accordance with local/regional/national/ international regulations.
Additional information: 100 % of the mixture consists of component(s) of unknown toxicity. Contains 0 % of components with unknown hazards to the aquatic environment.
2.3 Other hazards: Can cause a chain reaction, keep isolated.
3.1 Chemical characterisation: Mixtures · Description: Mixture of substances listed below with nonhazardous additions. · Dangerous components: Sarcasm 1A, H314 25-50%, Vocabulary 1A, H319 25-50% Additional information: Becomes more volatile when shaken as components combine.
4.1 Description of first aid measures · General information: Immediately remove casualty from proximity of the product. Tranquillise if necessary. Symptoms of reaction may even occur after several hours; therefore medical observation for at least 48 hours after the accident.
4.2 Most important symptoms and effects, both acute and delayed Spontaneous combustion and/or explosion. Corrosive damage to ego ·
4.3 Indication of any immediate medical attention and special treatment needed : Tea and sympathy for minor exposure. Medium exposure may require alcoholic beverages. Severe exposure may require tranquillisation.
5.1 Extinguishing media · Suitable extinguishing agents: Use felines and/or coffee.
5.2 Special hazards arising from the substance or mixture Can cause chain reaction, isolate immediately
5.3 Advice for firefighters · Protective equipment: Wear ear-plugs and keep mouths closed.
6.1 Personal precautions, protective equipment and emergency procedures Wear protective equipment. Keep unprotected persons away. ·
6.2 Environmental precautions: Dilute with plenty of felines. Do not allow to enter crowded places
6.3 Methods and material for containment and cleaning up: Attract with offers of coffee. Use neutralising feline agent. Dispose contaminated materials as waste according to item 13. Ensure adequate silence. Dispose of the material collected according to regulations.
· 7.1 Precautions for safe handling Ensure good levels of common sense at the workplace. Prevent contact with idiots. · Information about fire and explosion protection: Ear plugs required. ·
7.2 Conditions for safe storage, including any incompatibilities · Storage: · Requirements to be met by storerooms and receptacles: Reduced stupidity level. Presence of coffee and felines. · Information about storage in one common storage facility: Not recommended. · Further information about storage conditions: Keep temper container sealed.
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